Extinction (Crying It Out)

Crying it out involves putting a child to bed at a set bed time and then ignoring the child's cries until a set time the next morning. While this method has been documented as successful in resolving settling issues it is seldom an acceptable choice for parents who must listen to their distressed child crying.

One study showed that although the child cries for a prolonged period there is no memory of this and perhaps the child cries for so long that they forget why they were crying. Other children may cry until they vomit, which is even more distressing for the parent. Parents are naturally concerned about the effects of this "treatment" on the child's emotional and psychological development. Feeling that this is unnatural and goes against the parents natural desire to comfort the child, makes this harsh type of "treatment" difficult to administer and difficult to be consistent with.

There are many other ways to resolve this issue. Allowing a child to become and remain distressed for a period of time does not teach the child to learn to soothe themselves to sleep and this is one of the most valuable lessons we can offer our children.

If you have tried, or are considering using this method to get your child to sleep, be assured there are other techniques which are very effective and much kinder to parent and child.

If you struggle to get your child to self soothe to sleep Contact Dream-Angus.com we can help you to help your child improve their sleep pattern.

Controlled Crying

'Controlled crying' is the name given to a recognised behavioural management technique which is becoming more popular today. Its application works towards the "extinction" of an unwanted behaviour that may have been learned by the child over time and/or inadvertently encouraged by the parent. Checking on the child is done at progressively longer intervals and a minimal intervention technique is used during these "checks". The principal is simply that the child should not get a positive response from this crying i.e. a reward or parental attention. Thus the child learns that there is no benefit to crying for a prolonged period.
Success rate
This technique is effective if consistently applied. Both parents or carers need to be fully in agreement and work together to use it. There is no point in trying this technique if you cannot tolerate your child crying. One must remain calm and appear unaffected by the child's apparent distress. This can be too difficult for some parents to endure because it can be quite stressful. For these parents different techniques can be applied.

Controlled Crying is useful when the parents are sure that the crying is a result of the child's temperament or when the child is resistant to bedtime. This is a technique that should not be used for children under 18 months to 2 years, except in exceptional circumstances, as it can create feelings of insecurity or abandonment.

Visit www.Dream-Angus.com for more information and support. We offer a free, no obligation, chart to use if you are attempting to implement this technique.